a self portrait

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IMG_5120Have you ever lost hope? I did. Last year, in the midst of being bed-ridden and finding no answers from the doctors treating me, I stopped believing that I was worth anything. As a result, I did not think that YHWH would ever bless me. So when I say that I feel so blessed right now, you should understand that this is a BIG deal! The past 3 years have been more than rough in ways I just don't have enough space to explain here. I was grabbing at straws trying to come up with "plans" to make myself feel better about my future. I started pursuing music full time because I thought it was all I had left to give society and pay my bills. Then, Yah started opening doors. I, of course, freaked out at the uncertainty of it all and walked through with my eyes shut tight. Yet, now I have two of the best jobs possible for me and get to spend time with the most amazing people while I do them! What is truly spectacular is that this time last year I thought I was rapidly headed toward permanent wheel chair confinement and would never work steadily again (I could hardly hold things in my hands at some points and part of my disease results in cognitive difficulties from time to time). Yet, here I am making a living despite my constant fears for my health and life. I am astonished. Yah really is GOOD. 
Obeying YHWH isn't just about rules, it's about choosing the BEST.

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